Let Us Love Without Facilitating the Faults of Those We Cherish

I just read a piece in The Washington Post about the Sandy Hook shooter, Adam Lanza, and his mother, Nancy. It gave me chills. It made me sad, and it made me angry.

Parenting is one of the hardest things in the world to do, because walking that fine line between loving and enabling is as tricky as traversing a tightrope over Grand Canyon.

We can enable anyone: our partners, parents, lovers, or friends. But when it come to our children, we are particularly vulnerable. We want to give them everything they need. Those needs, however, often merge with their wants. We confuse doing what we know is best for them with doing what they think is best for them.

And, unfortunately, the catastrophic consequences will not be denied.

I beseech each of you to read the article by Ruth Marcus. Just click on the word “piece” in the first sentence to follow the link.

A very dear friend of mine once told me that our children will allow us to do for them just as much as we will do.

That phrase might be one we all need to post on our personal bulletin boards.


About Pam Avery Printed

I graduated from the University of Georgia in 1972 with a major in journalism (public relations) and a minor in business (marketing). My experience for the last 40 years includes working in the corporate world (banking), the newspaper industry (advertising design and sales), owning and selling a restaurant, restoring and utilizing several old buildings on the property, teaching private dance and drama lessons for 20 years, free-lance writing for a national textile firm, publishing two children’s books, and ghost writing a book. My last tour of duty before beginning the current chapter was working as a reporter, photographer, and columnist for five weekly community newspapers. And now I teach...media writing at Columbus State University in Columbus Ga. I consider myself very fortunate--I get to be around intelligent, energetic and enthusiastic young people. What a joy. I believe the written word is one of the most powerful tools known to humankind. And now we have the ability to reach millions with a simple click of the mouse. Wow.
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